I’m tired and… wanted to post something or other while I had some sorta uninterrupted time on a computer to talk about something?
I think.. with any luck.. I’m moving forward… soon I should have my car on the road and be in a position to look for work.. more properly.. and kinda take it from there.
There’s a feeling I have of not being totally there… I suppose the passing of my father is a decent enough reason.. that and the seemingly impossibility of getting the car on the road… or.. being able to do the job-e stuff.
No car… has a lot of implications.. but no job interview, no networking events, no ability to get to a job… kinda key things.
It’s stuff I have to do to pull myself out of poverty….. I suppose the larger objective is to try and heal.. to find some place where I can heal… I think such a place is likely better found through contacts then through job interviews.
And yest I have this other idea about it
My feeling is that it doesn’t matter what you do you just have to do it. The it is the only important part of it… that it doesn’t matter what it is as long as it indeed is it… which is.. whatever it is.
I know, crazy talk… but this came to me in a conversation where I was sorta talking on about on the subject of God.
Hold on you atheists… this can still have some value for you… in talking about God… I’m following the idea that it doesn’t matter if there is or is not a God.. we can study the behavior of the concept of God in human consciousness… and.. what I’m sorta looking at… is.. viewing certain kinds of “spiritual stuff” in terms of “psychological transformation.”
So.. the concept of God.. the definition… is that God is transcendent of definitions, of categories… I dare say reality it’s self is this way… What this means is God neither exists or doesn’t exist… is or isn’t… blah blah blah….
The point isn’t to talk about God in these terms so much as reality… and to understand the larger problem that reality… is not something we know anything about independent of experience… and experience doesn’t happen independent of psychology… so all of it is subject to psychology… and if you think of.. sorta various structures of consciousness as in someway operating as intermediaries between our selves and experience… at a certain point the real key to everything comes from evolving the relationship to these structures….
From a Jungian perspective.. the Gods of all religion and and mythologies are in fact expressions of the structure of the psyche so… it has a certain kinda value to look at it through this kinda prism.
But again.. my main point has to do with the relationship of our ideas of reality to reality… or reality we call experience and…
Err, it gets complicated sooner or latter.
And it is because of this strange psycho-surrealism nature of things.. that I can really do anything… as long as I’m doing it.. that it doesn’t matter what it is, as long as it is it… that the “it” in saying this has to do with the structure of the psyche inside of which experience happens… and so the specifics of the material world, of facts… the specifics of the situation… are all besides the point, as long as it’s about it. You see?
I’d go into this more deeply… accept that I suppose what I really want to say is that all the problems of life are at bottom inward problems… and in out the ward struggles… it is really our selves we are struggling with……
Err, but I gotta get going, so I guess that’s about all I have to say for now.. but there it is.
Bad Oedipus Music Journals 